Being "Mom"

I always wanted a large family. My dad is one of nine kids and they are almost all still very close, which I think is totally awesome. Even my 25+ cousins/second cousins are all pretty close. I love kids and I always thought I would do a pretty good job of handling a lot of kids. I have 2 awesome boys and I would love to have at least one or two more. But financially, we struggle to keep up with 2 kids so the 6-8 kids I always thought I would have is probably not in my future. At least not in a way I had planned in my "dream life."

I've come to the realization in the past few months that God clearly means for me to have a lot of children, just maybe in a way I would ever have expected. In the past few years, my family has become acquainted with and eventually friends with a couple of teenage girls who are/were in the foster care system. We're not currently in a position to take these girls into our home but we have certainly taken them into our lives. One has officially (although never legally adopted) become my sister-in-law, and another I would consider a little sister. They treat our boys as if they were their own siblings or even their own children and they never hesitate to spend time with us (and in fact seem to prefer it sometimes). "Little Sister" even recently volunteered to help with an event for Squeaker's school that she didn't even have to do. I try to lend an ear for these girls and provide them with a sense of normalcy and family life that they wouldn't otherwise get.

I also took on what appears to be a new project about a week ago that seems to be following a similar trend. The little girls in our neighborhood (all about age 8-9) were fighting and arguing about what appears to be trivial things and wandering the block unsupervised. Squeaker was starting to get involved in the fighting and taking sides, I think to protect his friend, and I decided I'd had enough and rounded up all the girls (about 4 or 5 of them). I tried to figure out what the fighting was about (which I never did get a straight answer) and I told them that as long as they all got along, they were allowed to come and play in our yard whenever I'm home. Two of the girls confessed to me that their mom is in jail, and the others don't seem to have a mom present either (aunties and grandmas, but no mom). I told all of them that if they ever needed someone to talk to, they could always come to me. I really didn't expect them to take me up on that, but an incident today proved me wrong. I won't go into details, but one girl (S) came knocking on my door this afternoon and said that one of the other girls (A) was crying and needed to talk to me. Mind you, S was one of the girls fighting with A last week, so that right there was a relief. The situation was resolved as best as I could handle it, and A has decided to start judo classes as well. I am hoping it will give her some self-confidence as well as hopefully a sense of belonging in a healthy, safe environment. I am trying to get the other girls in there too.

I am really hoping that by creating a steady presence for these girls (amazingly enough, it's only been girls so far), that I can make some measure of difference in their lives. Hubby has also felt a similar calling (to help kids with difficult home lives and/or in the foster care system) which is comforting to know we are going down the same path. I didn't set out looking for this life, but I have a feeling my future family is going to be a lot bigger than I ever dreamed. I only pray that God will continue to guide me in the way that He wants me to go.

Any fool can count the seeds in an apple. Only God can count all the apples in one seed. ~Robert H. Schuller